Ramblings

i ve tried and tried and tried, but i cant seem to make myself write about serious stuff...i mean yeah when someone takes up the topic of what an oh-holy-to-god culturally sensitive city , Bangalore is or when someone talks about how relationships need to be open, there come my arguments fast and furious (yeah yeah anup, laugh all you want!) ...but i just cant seem to pen them down...or rather i get bored with the topic too fast (as with everything else in my life :)!) and just let it be.

But im gonna write a line each for things that are happening around me so that i can get it out of me:
(1)Bombay blasts - Its a beautiful beautiful place and its a pity that some doggone assholes keep targetting that city to drop bombs on and they should be castrated at sight!
(2)Bangalore being a cosmopoilitan city - Balls to people who even dare say that...this city needs some decent people to begin with who dont run around destroying things and threatening people cause they speak in english instead of kannada!
(3)FIFA - I love Germany and it was a shame that France and Italy had to be in the finale...it wasnt even as interesting as Germany vs Portugal.Im just waiting for the English Premier League and I am currently trying to choose between Manchester United(cmon Cristiano is in that team!But if he moves to Real Madrid, then they get my support!!) and Chelsea(cause Anup likes this team and he's always right ;)!)
(4)Sitcoms - Sex and the city is my latest addiction and I have all 7 seasons of it and its weirdly realistic...of course tending toward that kind of depression bomber effect that Cosmopolitan has on me :)
(5)Open relationships - This is a doggone idea...this is for purely the dumb people!I will not elaborate further on this..as I have wasted enuf time yelling at people who believe in this.
(6)Zidane- Materazzi spat - I totally think what Zidane did was right and if Materazzi behaves like a scum he's the one who ought to be penalised and not Zidane especially since he's quit professional football on such a depressing note!And I think this was the same referee who was considered controversial cause he sent Rooney off for pushing Cristiano(much as I love this guy!!).

Adios then!

Oooh baby, I love that feeling

So so...i decided its time to go to the gym...two purposes, i was becoming a fat aunty getting fatter because of the scrumptious lunch at work..and i for the first time in my life, became conscious that I was putting on weight!for all those who dont know me...i just keep gobbling food and dont gain an inch!Second was , I was getting bored with the routine of going to work and some evening jaunts,i mean cmon there must be something more to life than that!

I went ballistic with the shopping for gym outfit...pretty pink trainers,tracks and what not...landed at the gym and they were like...so ma'm are you here for gaining weight?i gave them a flabbergasted look and said No!!!I m trying to keep slim here(that was very screechy)!So they took me to the treadmill and said hop on...hopped on obediently and then she started clicking some buttons and the thing started to move...and here i was pattering trying to run at some 1.6 speed!!!I tickle myself to death i say!!

Anyways after few such funny instances I have become quite the hit at the gym...the trainers love me cause i do all sorts of weight training with dumb bells and muscular tricep , bicep deals...and Im feeling so much younger!!!and I love going there...its like a family and u feel great once you ve done ur workout!For all those of you who have not experienced this oh so awesome feeling, I suggest head to your nearest gym ...and no, dont compromise on the expense part..the more expensive , the more exclusive your gym becomes.

Ooh, and Im quite the champ at TT these days ..must be the workouts that make me swish back and forth :) !!

On American Idol

Phew, I had written a long long blog on this one and the damn connection timed out!Well anyway, here we go again.....

I ve been watching American Idol religiously for seasons now...and for the sole reason that I firmly believe talent and stars emerge from this show...the umpteen rounds of elimination culls out the creme de la creme.This time round though, it has turned out to be an awful finale...the two finalists are simply put, mediocre!

Lets begin with Taylor Hicks...I love the way he unabashedly dances with two left feet , manages to create a riot on stage and the crowd loves him for his enthusiasm..hey, this is not a talent hunt for clowns buddy!He's got an oh-so passable voice...and sounds an awful lot like Michael Bolton..now how many of you want to see a Michael Bolton reincarnated?!!He's great at showmanship and if he wore a bikini, he would really make a ton of money at the local pub!!Judges seem to like him though....its true that Paula and Randy have the same thing to say to any contestant and frankly I dont think anyone cares a damn about their opinions(why pay for two when you get the same comments from either!)

Katherine McPhee...the other finalist, the girl with the beautiful strong voice...did i forget to mention this was two months back?Now she's just into doe-eyed looks and a helluva lot of acting.This girl lacks the modesty which we all liked when she opened her mouth and belted out those powerful numbers a long time back...she's affected and more into how she portrays herself to the audience than actual voice....her choice of songs for the finale was awful and then again , the finale itself was a massive letdown.Fans wave out placards reading 'Have you got McPheever?'.....unless I was a 16 yr old boy with pimples and getting those occassional hormonal surges, sorry, I really do not want McPheever!

Would I buy a CD by Taylor Hicks?NO!!Would I but a CD by Kat, yeah sure , why not...people seem to buy even trash like Britney's CDs!!The judges havent been fair this time round(though i love Simon), the votes have been tilted and overall , I really do not see either of them as huge stars!

My friend just called in to say, Taylor won...all i can say is,best of luck buddy!At least Simon's comments made the show worth a watch!

WooooHoo

That was a really long slumber!Decided to write in a post cause its a brand new year, a brand new job and im in a darn happy mood :)!Im starting off with our New Year bash....which was a mixed bag of funny,enjoyable and oh no!!!

Major natak went into where we were gonna shake a leg for New Years thanks to the terrorist attacks...and our first plan bombed out(definitely not literally!)..so we landed at The Park....and oh la, the whole world was there....we landed in a gang of 20 people by the pool...bonded away.didnt dance too much, just too engrossed in getting drunk!and who should land up in that sad state...but our very own Nudgee!the man who NEVER gets sloshed!

K boy and the i threw the boy into my car so i could deposit him in his house....he was anyways asleep/knocked out and I had to drive...in also a highly giddy state!eventually got my brand new car scratched on a tree stump!(damn why wasnt it a tree!)...got myself home..had a massive hangover for two days....put myself into shape for the new job a day later...went all spruced up (except for the bleary eyes) and oh la...its an MNC buddies, people here dont come in at 9!!anyways right now enjoying myself in my new place, being treated like a princess...thats a far far cry from my previous job!

so people, wish me luck this year...cause I definitely plan to kick ass at my job and at partying!

When cows become vehicles

Thought:Why does a crow ride on a cow?

(1)Cause it enjoys the slow mo speed of 1 km/hr.
(2)Crow is a she and has donned on a lot of make up for a party at the crows colony.Wants a rather unruffled free ride to the party.
(3)Crows eaten a heavy meal of 3 rats...burp

Damn random...readers, dont mind.

Height of laziness

Setting : 5 am on a cold wintry morning in pilani.Tightly curled into a ball and sleeping blissfully.

Suddenly i hear commotion and a pair of hands roughly trying to wake me up...i think its a dream and continue smiling in my sleep.

Rooom-mate:Vandana wake up wake up, get up
Me:Divya, its 5 am...go away(snuggle in deeper into the razai)
Room-mate:Vandana u really need to get up
Me:Look i love my sleep so go away
Room-mate:Dude cant u feel anything?
Me:Ummm...at 5 am?NO.
Room-mate:Vandana, its an earthquake...the warden wants us to get down and stand on the ground outside the hostel
Me:Hmmm interesting, earthquake and all...my first earthquake(I smile beatifically at the thought)...good good, u go down i will join u in sometime

Room-mate gives up on me and goes away running to save her life

Me: Yawwwwwwwnnnnn, stretch stretch...boy, its too comfortable man...ok let me just go back to sleep..hope the earthquake wont bring my hostel down

Shut my eyes and went back to sleep....5.7 Richter happened in that earthquake and im still alive :)!

Hisssssss

When: A year back
Where:At my college in Pilani
Setting : A terribly warm night in my hostel which overlooks the open desert...at one point of time we used to think that this scenery was damn good, until this episode.
Mood:Bored to death as my friends had gone to Delhi for the weekend and I was stuck with 52 degrees of heat and sand due to some pending assignment...so i was reading a book all curled up on my bed and waiting for some kind of tornado or one of those frequent earthquakes that used to happen at college.A long lost friend of mine calls and says 'Hey dinner tonight?'

Me: Hmmm, i suppose so(in that voice i use during weekends)
Friend:Will be there in 20.

So we meet up and go for dinner , feel fat and content and he comes back to drop me back at the hostel.I walk in through the hostel gates and i spot crowd(some were gossiping and some were running about..i think hmm, thats normal for girls..so walk on to my room)

Hysterical Girl(HG):Dude we just spotted a snake!
Me:Ho hum, okie...does it look nice?
HG:Vandana,that bloody snake is outside ur room!!
Me:(Slowly showing some interest)....really,wow man, im gonna be a star tomo
HG:Arrrrgh, i give up...anyways come come lets go see
Me:Yeah why not , why not...at least some entertainment

So i slowly trudge along to my room..and spot a mini crowd of around 20 girls outside my room and the warden and two huge bhishma pithama type guards with huge huge sticks..'hmmm now this is more interesting' .I go upto the warden to identify myself as the inmate of the blessed room

Me:Hi m'am...this is my room..any problem?
Warden:Oh my god, Vandana..there was a snke outside your room...give me ur room keys
Me:Was???and u still want my keys?
Warden:Well, its inside ur room now...
Me:(slowly getting a bit interested now)....okkkaaaayyy, here's my key m'am...but one thing is that i left my cupboard door open when i went out..do u think it would have gotten in?
Warden(Looking damn tensed)Vandana, why cant u close ur cupboard and keep?!
Me:But m'am i wasnt expecting a snake to visit me for dinner!

Warden gives an exasperated sigh and mumbles...Guards cautiously open my door and look in..no sign of the snake...they ask us girls to back off..and i decide, ok its gonna be some small thing which will go away..so i settle into a far corner and watch the fun.Guards go into the room,some yells surface , violent hitting noises for some 15 mins and then they come out looking victorious...they seem to be pulling/dragging out the snake.couple of girls take one look at screech and one fainted..i was too far away to see what it looked like.

Guard: Behenji, dekhiye aapke cupboard se kya mila hai...(pushes the damn thing over to me)
Me:Open mouth..no words situation

There lay a 6 foot long black snake which was not only ugly looking but very large and was .........a viper.....ladies and gentlemen,im thankful to the lord for the by-chance dinner that saved my life that night...and for not having made me the viper's dinner!